August 29, 2007

Imagine, in a quest to keep yourself “up to date, musically” you download an album by some random band you’ve been hearing a bit about. Upon listening to it, it immediately blows you and every piece of music you’ve ever created out of the water. Every song masterfully toes the line between impassioned folk pop and furious punk rock. The lyrics are so mind-blowingly awesome that you instantly feel bitterly jealous that you’ve yet to produce anything comparable. You wonder to yourself how these songs would sound acoustically, not stopping to think that perhaps the band would shortly demonstrate this perhaps whilst furiously promoting their recent creation.

Then, imagine having such an inflated sense of self worth that you go ahead and record YOUR OWN VERSION of said album, covering EACH and EVERY song in your own flaccid, acoustic manner and releasing it to the public so that anyone unfortunate enough to have not yet discovered the original material may perhaps associate your grinning mug with aforementioned awesomeness. Wouldn’t that be tops? To poop all over original band’s BRAND NEW ALBUM and any glory they’re currently basking in, so that you may enjoy being connected to some of the year’s best music. Oh while you’re at it, recreate the cover of the album to read your name, peddle your lacklustre wares on national radio and prove The Ataris to be the world’s most accurate lyricists when they so bitterly sang “I’ve never met someone so jaded, Your music’s really over rated, Nothing but a lot of pretentious noise”.

So sad that Tom Gabel’s fury was wasted on coffee shop boy, cos a couple thousand Against Me fans wouldn’t mind seeing Ben Lee cop a fistful of sweet retribution.